Again, maybe I was a little too restless last night but it's more fun when there are train wrecks to laugh about or pick apart. That's so catty of me. I apologize. I think it also had to do with the fact that there weren't many jaw-dropping dresses. Everyone, for the most part, looked like they pulled it together but stayed on the safe side. I appreciate the showing of color last night, especially red. It's better than seeing a sea of black dresses that just blend into one another so I guess I should give these poor actors a break, right? Nah, they get paid way to much to get a break. Let's flip it and reverse it and start with the Worst Dressed, shall we?
WORST
She may have won for best supporting actress, but Melissa Leo did not have the support of the fashion critics. I don't know why she felt the need to be inspired by Elvis but this dress was a hot tranny mess. She is on the mature side of the age scale and this dress just overpowered her. It was bulky, the color was drab, and it resembles some crocheted doile from grandma's couch. It's a good thing she won the Oscar. Hopefully the trophy took the attention away from her failed frock.
Not only does this actress bother me as a whole, she can NEVER get it right when it comes to her award shows. Nicole does better when she's attending awards for her dish of a husband, Keith Urban, but when the spotlight is on her, she loses all fashion sense. She said in a press conference that she takes fashion advice from her daughter, Sunday Rose. Umm, Nicole, she's like two years old. When I was two I thought pink and purple Barbie shoes were a perfect match for my red and white striped jumper with 10 clips in my hair. Even Keith can't stand to look at that attempt of a modern makeshift Kimono dress. Get a clue and a stylist.
She's made the list again, and not in a good way. Good 'Ol Divorced Scar Jo has wrapped herself in a craptastic dress yet again. This lacey lingerie dress is so lackluster I can't even stand it. The duel colors aren't very fetching. I'm not a big maroon fan to start with and color lace can be tricky. If you don't pick the right hue, it just looks cheap. Then to top this monstrosity off is her bedhead and overkill eye makeup. She has such a beautiful, classic glamour look that she doesn't need to pile on the shadow. Next time, put a comb through your hair and stick to the old hollywood style that you do so well.
This next leading lady is so fantastic in her movies and is always known for her risk-taking fashion. She did not let us down this time either. I appreciate wanting to stand out and wear something unique. In fact, I encourage that. However, it's a fine line between crazy and cool. I love the colors to this dress. It's very light and airy, but the design looks like a jelly fish crop circle. Not a fan of the nautical alien chic. Phone home, Cate. This dress is too out of this world.
I don't think Julia Ormond has been in anything to write home about since she sampled all the brothers in Legends of the Falls, but she should probably continue to stay out of the limelight if she's going to choose pieces like this. It looks just like Christina Aguilera's dress from the Grammy's and it was a failure there too. She looks washed out, her hair and makeup don't match the essence of the dress, and even in this photo it looks like she's apologizing for wearing the dress. Apology accepted. Now go burn that dress so we never see it again...on anyone!
Sharon Stone. Two words: Cruella Deville. All the dalmations in Hollywood took cover last night.
I feel bad for always commenting on Natalie Portman especially since she's pregnant and I'm sure is annoyed she has so many damn red carpet events to attend while she grows by the day, but like I said before, I just KNOW there are better maternity options. This dress, oddly enough, looked matronly and she is NOT matronly. I think it would have been beautiful in an emerald green or vibrant blue. This color, much like Scar Jo, just isn't very dazzling. Her previous dresses, while they haven't been my favorite either, at least had a hint of youth in them. This selection looks like it could be worn by someone in their 50s who is a little shy to show their arms. The shoes look like she is going to her first junior high dance and the hair looks unfinished. Regarding fashion, her due date can't come soon enough.
Okay, I'm feeling too critical. It's time to hop on the Best Dressed list. Lights, camera, action!
BEST
Will all the bombshells please step forward! Va-Va-Voom Jennifer Lawrence stood out among this crowd by leaps and bounds. Her hair, body, and makeup were perfection. This is a perfect example of making something simple look outrageously amazing. She let her natural, ahem, attributes, do all the work. The red carpet must have been drool stained after she walked it.
Amy Adams from The Fighter is one of my favorite actresses because she's not only a great actress and loveable, she realizes jewel tones are her best friends. I think her look was glamourous, bold, and completely flattering. This look is a total knockout (get it, that's boxing reference. haha!)
Celine Dion is the epitome of an ugly duckling transformed to a beautiful swan, and this dress emphasized that metamorphosis perfectly. It was magnificently tailored, the color was white hot, and the dress fit her frame like a glove. Perfect execution.
She's played a queen, is an actual dame, and knows how to dress for her age and rockin' body. Helen Mirren can teach these young, clueless actresses a thing or two about dressing for your age and body. She hits it right on the mark everytime and outshines any starlett with class and grace. I hope to look just as amazing when I reach her age because honey, she makes aging look GOOD!
She may have played an alcoholic mess of a country singer in Country Strong, but there was nothing washed up about Gwyneth Paltrow's awesomely edgy Calvin Klein number. The board straight hair complimented the modern feel to this dress and rounded out this look for a true shining star.
Another winning example of dressing age appropriately was exemplified by True Grit's Hailee Steinfeld. She looked so adorable you could just put her on top of a cake. It reminded me of an updated 50's style prom dress: demure and elegant. From her sweet little headband down to her ballet pink peep toes, this girl washed off that grit and rocked the glam!
Last but not least, we have the incredible shrinking woman sponsored by Weight Watchers, Jennifer Hudson. This color against her skin was stunning. Her hair was up and framed her face beautifully. My only complaint is the boobage situation. From time to time they seemed a little lopsided, which I'm sure is an issue since she's lost so much weight. I can't help but wonder what this dress would have looked like with a sweetheart strapless neckline and a lovely necklace. Regardless of the tatas and halter, she worked it like a true diva.
There you have it, Sugars! From the worst to the best the lists aren't too bad. Of course it's fun when celebrities look like they've lost their mind, but all in all, I am here to embrace fashion, admire design, applaud uniqueness, and share stories. Even though the Oscars were pretty much a snore, at least we had some pretty dresses to keep our attention.
Love and shoes,
Kim
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